posted by Kyle on Aug 19
As the following graph so eloquently demonstrates, pirates quickly and effectively deplete greenhouse gases, thus leading to a lower overall global temperature:
The Solution is Simple
Recruit Al Gore and his friends to form a Pirate’s Union in order to increase the number of pirates. Wait. No. That would destroy piracy on the high seas.
Just give IRS agents boats.
The more IRS agents who have boats, the lower the global temperature will get. After about five years, our country will need Ron Paul in order to prevent a new ice age (we’ve heard about a coming ice age before, haven’t we?)
But wait, pirates kill people!
When was the last time socialist environmentalist have cared whether their policies kill people? Hmmm….
No new coal fired electricity plants in Africa….hundreds of thousands of children die each year of respiratory diseases caused by smoke from indoor cooking fires. But what’s a few hundred thousand kids mean when we can save the polar bears?
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